We will disagree: an unavoidable reality of being human. The most frustrating part of my life, in my relationship with others, is being misunderstood. If we disagree, I can deal with that. But when I say one thing, and someone thinks I said something else, ahh…that just grinds me. It hurts me to think that, the person knows me, but still somehow has convinced themselves to think that I would say something else. That really, really bothers me.
But in close second place: that we are all in different places in life. Spiritually, physically, emotionally, intellectually: we all grow at a different pace. Life would be so much simpler if I could love you in my unique way, and no one would question my motives, or my intentions. That true freedom would exist, to love wildly, without reservation. I have embraced the idea that we should value “relationship over reputation,” but that is more difficult for some, than perhaps it was for me. I understand that. But…does that mean my contribution, my role in bringing the Kingdom should, get put aside? Because some people think poorly of me, does that mean that I am hurting the Kingdom, more than I am bringing it? Jesus was a rebel: so should we be. Jesus was about His Father’s business, and He didn’t care if He was slandered: neither should we. Christ lived a life that, when questioned or slandered, His reputation destroyed any rumor. He was known as a gentle and passionate man, and every lie suggested by those who would oppose Him, was immediately conquered by truth. I want that, I want you to have that. God should be so absolutely present in every decision and action we take, His righteousness consuming every aspect of us, that who we are simply cannot be questioned, especially by those in the church. And yet, I have experienced this…more than once.
My answer: I don’t care. Or more accurately: I am commanded to not care. We are all commanded to serve God and His decrees, without fear of man, fear of, well, anything. The only thing we should ever fear, is God. Be sure, I am not saying that the path to bringing the Kingdom results in the destruction of others, though it certainly can and does. Like Paul said, I will never do anything to cause someone to stumble. But let us graciously consider whether someone is really causing us to stumble. Let us come to understand what it means to stumble. “To stumble” does not mean to be bothered by, to not understand, to wonder about, or to question. If that were the case, then, out of respect for others, no one would have tattoos, piercings, eat meat, be affectionate (even when married) in public…the list can go on and on. I feel like the verse “do not cause anyone to stumble” has been misused so profusely, that we don’t even know what it means anymore! We use it to get our way, or, when we are overcome by our enemy, use it to discourage others in their efforts to bring the Kingdom of God! Why would we do this? May it never, for the sake and glory of God, be said of us!
One of the greatest things I wrestle with, personally: God, I don’t want to be here…I want to come Home. Not because I am running from pain, hardship, or work (in fact, lately, those have become beautiful parts of life), but because I want to exist in a place that is constantly filled with love, honor, and joy. I want to be who I am, without question. I want to live in a place where people are who they were created to be. I so desperately want to live in a place where people are not cowards (including myself), where people feel safe and can ask the tough questions, and be respected and welcomed in. I want to be rid of this world, forever, and live in the presence of Glory.
But…God’s plans are bigger than that. God’s plans are, more complex, and more beautiful than that.
We can’t run. The greatest aspect of the Kingdom (in my opinion) is relationship, and the deepest part of relationship, is unity/commitment/covenant. Unity is the thing that holds two or more people together. Unity is what makes marriages, not just exist, but persevere. The realization that, even though I disagree with you, or am very much angered with you, or was deeply wounded by you, I am committed to you, in covenant, and for the sake of unity found only in God’s Kingdom, to you. That even when I am scared by you, I will stay. That even when you ignore me, I will stay. That even anything, as long as God keeps me there, I, will, stay, and love you well. Because that is what Christ did! That’s what Christ does!
That even when I feel I am receiving nothing, I will continue to give, because, I have already received everything. When God’s love is deeper than the ocean and higher than the sky, I can always love you, and I have no need of anything. That is hard, but it is sooo good.
This is my prayer: that unity from love would be found in the hardest times of my relationship with you, my friend, my brother, my sister, my leader, my teacher, my elder, my child, my bride, my God! That unity and honor would rain on our relationship in the driest of seasons. That, in all things, you know I will still catch and support you when you’re falling. That not only am I committed to you, but that God is committed to us. God has bound us together, and we would do well to serve each other, even when we are at odds.
May we be bound, not for our sake, but for the sake of Glory. When our pictures of God’s Kingdom differ, may the Kingdom even still be glorified by our unity, and love for each other.
I love you. Live with purpose, fulfilled by the unity founded in the body and bride of Christ.
Beautiful and radiant, broken and calloused, gentle and ferocious. Yeah. Be courageous. Be compassionate. Be united.
We were born, for that.